


Sleepless.

by LunaVitaeSuae



Series: Tumblr stuff [12]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Anxiety, Gen, Panic Attack Mention, Platonic Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-31
Updated: 2016-10-31
Packaged: 2018-08-28 03:10:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8429218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LunaVitaeSuae/pseuds/LunaVitaeSuae
Summary: You hadn't slept in a week, you were weak, you were awake.





	

You hadn’t slept in a week, you were weak, you were awake. You didn’t think you’d ever seen someone more in need of a break. Yep, your anxiety was rearing its ugly head again, setting off your insomnia.

You sat up, staring at your computer screen, late late at night. Again. Since it was so late at night (or was it morning?) refreshing the screen never showed you anything new. You had gone through Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook, and Instagram for the seventh time so far. You had word documents open, half filled with crazy ramblings you liked to refer to as your writing. But there was no progress to be made, not now.

A slight ding sounded and you switched over to Facebook, where you had a new message.

 

James: why on earth are you up right now?  
You: *shrug emoji* can’t sleep  
James: don’t you have work in a few hours?  
You: Nah, I’m off today  
James: more reason to sleep, don’t you think?  
James: and don’t you dare shrug emoji at me  
You: then I have no response at all

 

Your phone rang then. You looked at the caller ID. James was calling.

“Hello?”

“(Y/N), you need to sleep.”

“Hiya, James, how’s it going? How’s life?”

“Don’t get snarky with me now.” You scrunched your face up at your phone.

“Am I allowed to say ‘shrug emoji’ over the phone?”

Silence.

“Okay, okay. Be that way. But I still can’t sleep.”

“Do you want me to come over? I’d say you could come over here, but since I’m pretty sure you haven’t slept in a few days, I don’t want you driving or walking.”

“I mean, you can if you want. I’m not doing much of anything right now, anyways.”

“Great, I’ll see you in twenty minutes.” You said your good-byes and hung up. You weren’t lying about not doing anything, so you just sat there and kept staring at your computer screen. You ended up zoning out and not hearing James enter your tiny apartment.

You had almost forgotten that you had given your best friend a key to your apartment. He had never needed it before. You were always alert enough to let him in, or he was with you when you got home.

He set a bag down beside you and that you jumped. You looked over and saw that James had brought a bag of breakfasty foods from McDonalds.

“Sorry for not having more variety. The kitchens are pretty much shut down at this hour.” James sat down beside you and started pulling food out. He handed you a small wrapped McGriddle and you ripped into it, downing it in less than a minute. James stared at you as you brushed a few crumbs off of your shirt.

“Whaaaat? Those are so damn good, I can’t restrain myself.”

“That was almost scary to watch. I thought you unhinged your jaw for a moment. Like a giant snake.”

You shoved his shoulder and went back to browsing Tumblr. Not that there was even anything new to look at. You really needed to find new blogs to follow.

You set your computer down and sighed. James looked up from his phone.

“You okay?”

“Yeah, I’m just bored.”

“You could always try sleeping.”

“Nah.”

“(Y/N), what’s going on? You’ve barely slept in like a week.”

You raised one shoulder in a shrug, you didn’t really like talking about what gave you anxiety, which was literally everything.

What if’s that you knew would never happen. Like, what if you fell down the stairs and broke your arm? You couldn’t afford to go to the hospital? What if you had to become a stripper to pay off your bills? You couldn’t dance? You were a giant klutz! That’s whY YOU FELL IN THE FIRST PLACE AND

“(Y/N), what’s wrong? Your eyes just got really big and your face went really pale and… Are you even breathing right now?” A hand gently rested on your arm. You snapped out of your internal screaming and started breathing again. You gave James a sheepish smile and snuggled into his side, hiding your face.

“It’s… my anxiety. I haven’t gotten my prescription filled yet and it’s… throwing me off.” James didn’t say anything, he didn’t have too. He had seen more than his share of your panic attacks and other various freakouts. He knew how bad things could get for you.

“I’ll take you to the pharmacy tomorrow, okay? We’ll get you sorted out. And even then, you’ve got me to help you through things.”

He slipped his arms around you and pulled your weight into his lap, letting you continue your snuggle, but this time on his chest. You rubbed your face against his shirt, catlike, while he put his arms around you. His hand came up to brush your hair out of your face and remained there, gently petting your head.

You kept your head against his chest and just listened to his heart beating. It calmed you and your mind, allowing you to release your tensions. Your hand came up and you started drawing little shapes on his chest, no clear design in mind.

The next thing you knew, you were being gently lifted and carried to your room. James had no trouble carrying your much smaller body across your apartment and opening your bedroom door. He deposited you into your bed and began tucking you in.

When he turned to leave, you made a slight noise, drawing his attention. He turned to look back at you and you reached a hand out sluggishly, managing to land on his wrist.

“Stay?” Your voice sounded small. James said a quiet ‘okay’ and sat on the side. He kicked his shoes off and crawled under the blanket beside you. The two of you laid there, side-by-side and awkward. 

You hadn’t shared a bed since the time you two had decided to try and date. Your other friends had been expecting it for ages and you figured you might as well try. It hadn’t worked out romantically, but you were one of the lucky pairs who hadn’t ruined your friendship and for that you were thankful. You had been able to fall right back into being best friends again, your experiment with dating not forgotten, but not a terrible thing to have in your memories.

You decided that you weren’t going to get any sleep like that, so you rolled over and slipped under his arm, pulling him toward you. This seemed to break the slight tension and he pulled you closer. You were able to relax into the embrace and you drifted off to sleep.


End file.
